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You Need Spiritual Food for Spiritual Strength

Wednesday, 19 April 2017 by Johnny Harwood

“Search, You Need Spiritual Food for Spiritual Strength for the LORD and his strength. Always seek his presence” (1 Chronicles 16:11 GW).

Just like you need physical food for physical strength, you need spiritual food for spiritual strength. The Bible describes itself as spiritual food — the water, milk, bread, and meat of our spiritual lives. It’s everything you need for sustenance.

If you were a construction contractor, you wouldn’t consider sending out a guy who hadn’t eaten anything in two weeks. If you were a commander in the Army, you wouldn’t send a person into battle who hadn’t eaten in a month. Right? We need to feed ourselves to have the strength to accomplish the tasks ahead of us.

You’re not going to have much success in winning the spiritual battles you face if you’re starving yourself to death. That’s why we need to feed on the Word of God.

Unlike eating physical food, whenever I feed on God’s Word, I get even hungrier. The more I taste and see how good God is, the more I want.

The Bible says in Colossians 3:16a, “Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly” (NIV). Paul is telling us to let the Bible take up residence in our lives in a rich, profound, and life-giving way.

So how do we feed ourselves on the Word of God and allow that to happen?

  • Receive the Word with your ears. Commit yourself to go to church and listen to God’s Word being preached.
  • Read the Word with your eyes. Having a Bible in your house is not going to bless your life. You have to have the Bible in your heart.
  • Research the Word with your hands and mouth. When studying the Word of God, keep a pencil in your hand. Write down what God teaches. Talk about what you’re discovering with other believers in a small-group environment.
  • Reflect on the Word with your mind. Think about and chew on God’s Word.
  • Remember the Word with your heart. You’ll rarely have a Bible with you when you need it. Commit God’s Word to memory.

Talk It Over

  • What changes do you need to make in your life so that you are spiritually nourished?
  • Do you write down what God teaches you? What you are memorizing from Scripture?
  • What spiritual battle are you fighting today? Have you turned to God’s Word for sustenance?

Full Article can be found Here

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6 Reasons God Says No To Our Prayers

Wednesday, 05 April 2017 by Johnny Harwood

Reasons God Says No

God does not arbitrarily or capriciously say no; as with all of His other actions, He has a purpose.  Let’s consider some of the reasons God says no to some of our requests.

1.  We harbor unconfessed sin – Psalm 66:18

The Bible makes it clear that we all sin and sin breaks our fellowship with God. (1 John 1:5-10) Maintaining the open line of fellowship with God is the most important need we have in life.  Before granting any other requests we make, God wants us to deal with sin that breaks our fellowship with Him.

God says no not to punish us, but to focus us on the greatest need we have – fellowship with Him.

2.  We ask selfishly – James 4:3

Consequently, another reason God says no to us is because our request is self-focused rather than kingdom-focused.  In the Model Prayer, Jesus taught us to pray for the accomplishment of His will and kingdom. (Matthew 6:9-13)  God delights to give us things that advance His agenda, and He is loathe to grant us our selfish desires.

3. Our request is not good for us. – James 1:17

The verse above teaches us that God gives us whatever is good for us. The phrase “good gift” reminds us that God has given us anything good we already have.  The phrase “perfect gift” teaches us that God will give us everything that could possibly be good for us.

Often God says no to us for our own good. I can think of specific times God said no to my request when I later looked back in thanksgiving.

4.  The timing is not right.  Ecclesiastes 3:1, 11

Sometimes, God says no only for a season.  He may intend to eventually grant our request, but He knows a future time will better serve His purposes.  As Solomon observed, God makes everything beautiful in its time.

5.  God wants to test our persistence. Luke 18:1-8

In the parable of the persistent widow and unjust judge, Jesus encouraged us to “always pray and not lost heart.”  Since He enjoys our fellowship, sometimes God says no for a season to keep us in prayer.  That time of seeming delay, however, is also for our good.  During the season of delay, God is shaping us and building our faith in Him.

How to Respond When God Says No

1.  Trust the goodness of God.  Know that God has a very good reason for saying no to your request.

2.  Examine your heart for lingering sinful attitudes and/or actions you have not addressed.  Exercise 1 John 1:9, confess, receive cleansing, and move on in obedience.

3.  Consider your motives for your request.  Ask God to help you seek HIS kingdom first.

4.  Continue to pray until you sense you have received God’s final “no.”

Do not lost heart when God says no, it may only be temporary.  Even if not, you can trust His wisdom and goodness, and know He will give you what is best.

Full Article Can Be Found Here

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3 Ways to Know If An Open Door Is From God

Tuesday, 21 March 2017 by Johnny Harwood

Just because an opportunity presents itself, and it looks appealing, doesn’t necessarily mean it is from God. And likewise, just because an open door looks a little uncertain, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t walk through it.

The key is knowing how to discern if an opportunity is really an open door from God. I don’t want to miss those open doors because I was afraid to walk through them. But I also don’t want to take every opportunity that comes along, assuming it is from God’s hand and has his blessings attached.

In a recent conversation with a friend we talked about the faith and courage to walk through a door that God is holding open for us, even if we’re not exactly sure of what’s on the other side. But then the question came up: How can you tell if God is the one opening the door?

The Bible gives us some principles to help us discern if an “open door” or opportunity is really from God:

 

1. The Door that God Opens Will Never Contradict His Word

Many Christians see opportunities to make more money as an open door from God, even though the opportunity means a job that will keep them from regular fellowship or service in their church. However, God’s Word tells us not to neglect meeting together for worship (Hebrews 10:25). Some women have told me that they believe God opened a door to a dating relationship for them, even though it meant being in a situation where they were “unequally yoked” with an unbeliever, which Scripture also warns against (2 Corinthians 6:14). God will not lead you toward an opportunity that contradicts what he clearly says in his Word. Nor will he open a door that would require personal compromise or disobedience in order for you to enter. As humans prone to sin, we have an excellent way of turning a clear mandate of God’s completely around and justifying it by our circumstances, but that is not how God works. If there is a compromise in any way, or we have to bend Scripture to justify our “open door” then it is likely not a door that God is opening for us. I would call anything that contradicts his Word a temptation, rather than an open door from God. And God’s Word clearly says that God does not tempt us (James 1:13-14).

 

2. The Door that God Opens Will be Accompanied by Confirmation 

In Matthew 18:15-16, Jesus laid out instructions for confronting sin among believers saying “But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses’.” I believe the same applies when it comes to God confirming something in his Word. He will often confirm or establish a matter by “two or three witnesses” whether they be verses from the Word of God, advice from a pastor or well-respected person who is grounded in Scripture, or a non-compromising circumstance that continues to present itself. Through prayer, discernment and seeking godly counsel, you should be able to tell if that “open door” and its confirmations are truly coming from God.

 

3. The Door God Opens Will Require You to Depend on Him

God is not going to give us something that will alienate us from him or make us believe we no longer need him. He is a God of relationship, and a God who insists upon being first in our lives (Matthew 6:33). Therefore, if you find yourself saying “I can’t do this unless God goes before me,” or “I can do this, but only with God’s help and leading” I would say, in my personal experience, it’s likely something God is calling you to do. Hebrews 11:6 says: “And without faith it is impossible to please him, for he who comes to God must believe that he is and that he is a rewarder of those who seek him.” Many times an “open door” from God is one that allows our faith to be stretched and strengthened. That, after all, is God’s objective for us: to grow in faith and Christ-likeness.

Take your opportunity or “open door” to God and ask for his confirmation – through his Word and godly counsel from others – and his peace in the decision, and you can have the assurance that you aren’t just choosing a door at random, but you’re carefully walking through the ones he wants you to enter.

Full article can be found here

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5 Ways To Know If A Job Is God’s Will

Monday, 06 March 2017 by Johnny Harwood

Vocation and profession have an important role to play in fulfilling God’s purposes and plans in our life. They’re not everything, but they are an important factor. When God created man, He gave him the privilege of work in His Garden.

Genesis 1:28 says, “And God blessed them. And God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.'”

Earthly professions are not simply a means to make ends meet, but also our opportunity to participate in God’s work here on earth.

But how do we know if a certain career path – whether that’s one you are currently on or one you are planning to enter – is God’s will for us or not? Here are five signs that a certain job is really what God is calling us into.

It Glorifies God. The chief end of any profession is the glory of God and the advancement of His kingdom. Do our jobs or the jobs we plan to enter into honor God and His commandments? Does the way we carry them out show integrity and the fear of the Lord? The one necessity to every job is that it is to glorify God.

You Enjoy Your Job. God gives us work not simply as a duty, but in many ways also to be a delight. That’s not to say that our feelings should be the primary indicator of God’s blessing over it. Sometimes it’s also a matter of learning to love what you do and coming to terms with the value that is behind it.

You Are Good At It and Continue To Become Better At It. Anything and everything God calls us into will not just be enjoyable, but something we actually have the gift and skill for. God wants us to work excellently at what we do and one way He makes sure of that is by matching us to a profession where we maximize the talents He gives us.

It brings financial reward. The reality is that our jobs are God’s primary way of providing for our daily needs. Unless a job is meeting your financial needs, it cannot be sustainable. God is planning for the long term and for that to happen, your job must be sustainable and one that involves being fairly and adequately compensated monetarily.

Your Profession Blesses Others. More than just being a blessing to us, our jobs are intended also to bless people around you. Does your job bless your boss, co-workers, clients, and family? If it does then that’s a good sign that you are where God wants you to be.

Full article can be found here
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Those who flourish in ministry are intentional about their well-being

Monday, 27 February 2017 by ccfadmin

Challenges are part of any ministry, yet some clergy thrive despite the inevitable setbacks. New research shows that their keys to success can be boiled down to a few simple strategies available to anyone.

Some clergy seem to rise above the fray.

They face the same sorts of challenges that are present in any church: critical congregants, hectic schedules, pressure to devote more time to others and thus minimal time to caring for themselves. They don’t always get it right; in fact, they’ll say they are far from having it all figured out. Yet they’re flourishing in ministry.

What sets them apart?

In a recent study, researchers at the Clergy Health Initiative at Duke Divinity School (link is external) interviewed 52 church-appointed pastors about their daily lives and how they approach challenges, and invited them to complete a series of surveys and maintain a daily activity log for one week.

The participants were selected based on their responses to an earlier study of the predictors of positive and negative mental health in clergy, through which they had answered questions about components of positive mental health. Among the participants were clergy who had been identified as flourishing, with positive mental health scores at the highest levels, and those identified as languishing, with scores in the bottom third of the continuum.

When the researchers compared the new data from these two sets of pastors, they noticed important differences in how the two groups take care of themselves and orient their work. One factor stood out above the rest, however: flourishers attend to their well-being (link is external). In fact, the researchers found that 94 percent of clergy with flourishing mental health are intentional about spending time on personal care such as exercise, prayer, family relationships and hobbies.

The good news: the strategies they employ to achieve this balance are available to everyone, clergy and laity alike. These strategies can form a playbook of sorts for how to attain positive mental health.

“Some people, including some clergy, still feel that the very nature of clergy work sets pastors apart — that above all else, pastors are called to serve, so the human need to attend to oneself shouldn’t apply,” said Rae Jean Proeschold-Bell, the research director for the Clergy Health Initiative. “But this just doesn’t hold up. The flourishing pastors’ beliefs and actions show that applying intentionality and nurturing relationships with friends and family actually make all the difference.”

Flourishing clergy focus on working in alignment with God.

Strategy 1: Remember who it is that you serve.

Rather than looking for praise from the pews, aim to derive your sense of success from knowing you’re doing your all to enact the work God has called you to. Also, keep in mind that you are participating in a process — you are working with God, and God alone sees the full picture.

Strategy 2: Discern, discern, discern.

Create time for spiritual disciplines like prayer and Bible study to understand the work God is calling you to do.

Flourishing clergy are proactive and flexible in taking care of their physical and mental health.

Strategy 3: Prioritize healthy behaviors.

There is tremendous pressure to eat what is offered to you at church gatherings. Remind yourself that your congregants don’t want to make you unhealthy. Take smaller portions, and don’t feel awkward about it. Go to the doctor regularly; get annual checkups. Get outside. Ride bikes, play golf, or go for a walk every day and set a goal for the number of steps you want to log. Make healthy activities a priority, but also be flexible about how you incorporate those health behaviors into your daily routine. Pastors’ lives are too unpredictable to keep to the same habits all the time, but that doesn’t mean you have to dismiss your health goals.

Strategy 4: Invest in spiritual care.

Start each day by reading the Bible. If you’re traveling and can’t read along the way, listen to a devotion on an MP3 player or mobile device. Set aside time for prayer and one-on-one communion with God. Keep a regular Sabbath.

Strategy 5: Make time for personal interests.

In addition to pursuing the activities you care about, look for opportunities to incorporate them into your ministry.

Flourishing clergy are intentional about setting boundaries around their work and personal lives.

Strategy 6: Pick the time that works for you.

Schedule activities in functional blocks. Pick one night of the week when you will attend nighttime church meetings, and urge others to use this as a basis for scheduling. Set “office hours” for when you will be available at the church each week.

Strategy 7: Use space creatively.

One pastor described taking regular “office hours” in a local McDonald’s. This allows him to have space outside the church to connect with church members, as well as the broader community. To create distance from their work on an afternoon off, some pastors recommend going out of town — even if it’s only as far as the next town.

Strategy 8: Communicate clearly and regularly.

If you keep a Sabbath, include that information in the signature of your emails. If you have to say no to a request on your day off, offer an alternate time to help. Ask your congregants, staff and other key people about their top priorities for you, and share your own. Then discuss where your expectations diverge. Being honest about your gifts and limitations as a leader is important.

Strategy 9: Manage your technology.

Some pastors set a stop time every evening, after which they do not pick up incoming calls. These clergy say they check their voicemail and will respond if there’s an emergency, but by waiting for a message, they can determine whether a request needs to be addressed during off hours. Work with another pastor or spiritual leader who can be “on call” when you are off or away. Include that person’s contact information in your automatic email reply and your outgoing voicemail message.

Flourishing clergy nourish friendships and mutual relationships.

Strategy 10: Find support from other clergy.

Identify another pastor who can serve as a mentor. Form or join a peer or covenant group. Find at least one person in whom you can confide and from whom you can draw support in the face of ministerial and personal challenges.

Strategy 11: Seek out emotional support from family and friends.

Meet a friend for lunch, especially if you feel yourself getting down or low on energy. Create an annual ritual, such as a retreat with friends, to maintain important connections. Make yourself accountable to a close friend or spouse who knows the day-to-day stresses you’re facing; help each other maintain boundaries and healthy practices.

Those who set priorities and adjust their plans to attend to those priorities on a near-daily basis aren’t undone when difficult circumstances arise; they find their way through. They embrace challenges. They avoid symptoms of depression, anxiety and burnout. They flourish.

“If you’re wondering whether these basic strategies make a difference, they do,” Proeschold-Bell said. “Even though they sound like good common sense, they are hard to enact — but worth it. They are what differentiated flourishing pastors.”

Originally posted Here

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The Defense for Creation

Tuesday, 31 January 2017 by Johnny Harwood

THE ISSUE: Does current scientific data support the theory that the universe was created with intelligent design?

WHAT SKEPTICS SAY: Belief in an intelligent designer is a religious theory that has no basis in science. Scientific data supports evolutionary theory, and everyone knows it.

WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS: “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth” (Genesis 1:1). “The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands” (Psalm 19:1).

THE DESIGN HYPOTHESIS

“A big, fundamental question, like belief in God (or disbelief), is not settled by a single argument,” said physicist-turned-theologian John Polkinghorne in Quarks, Chaos, and Christianity. “It’s too complicated for that. What one has to do is to consider lots of different issues and see whether or not the answers one gets add up to a total picture that makes sense.”

That’s the approach I took in my investigation. I probed six different scientific disciplines to see whether they point toward or away from the existence of an intelligent designer.

When I opened my mind to the possibility of an explanation beyond naturalism, the theory denying any supernatural existence in the universe, I found that the design hypothesis — that says there is a purposeful, intelligent, created order to the universe — most clearly accounted for the evidence of science. Consider some of the facts from my investigation:

The Evidence of Cosmology

Thanks to scientific discoveries of the last 50 years, the ancient kalam cosmological argument has taken on a powerful and persuasive new force. As described by William Lane Craig, the argument is simple yet elegant: First, whatever begins to exist has a cause.

Second, the universe had a beginning. Based on the data, virtually all cosmologists now agree the universe began in the Big Bang at some specific point in the past. Craig stressed that even alternate theories for the origin of the universe require a beginning.

The conclusion then follows from the two premises: Therefore, the universe has a cause. Even once-agnostic astronomer Robert Jastrow conceded the essential elements of Christianity and modern cosmology are the same: “The chain of events leading to man commenced suddenly and sharply, at a definite moment in time, in a flash of light and energy.”

The Evidence of Physics

One of the most striking discoveries of modern science has been that the laws and constants of physics unexpectedly conspire in an extraordinary way to make the universe habitable for life. For instance, said physicist-philosopher Robin Collins, gravity is fine-tuned to one part in a hundred million billion billion billion billion billion.

The cosmological constant, which represents the energy density of space, is as precise as throwing a dart from space and hitting a bull’s-eye just a trillionth of a trillionth of an inch in diameter on Earth. One expert said there are more than 30 physical or cosmological parameters that require precise calibration in order to produce a universe that can sustain life.

The Evidence of Astronomy

Similar to the fine-tuning of physics, Earth’s position in the universe and its intricately choreographed geological and chemical processes work together with exquisite efficiency to create a safe place for humans to live.

For example, astronomer Guillermo Gonzalez and science philosopher Jay Wesley Richards said it would take a star with the highly unusual properties of our sun — the right mass, the right light, the right age, the right distance, the right orbit, the right galaxy, the right location — to nurture living organisms on a circling planet. Numerous factors make our solar system and our location in the universe just right for a habitable environment.

What’s more, the exceptional conditions that make life possible also happen to make our planet strangely well-suited for viewing and analyzing the universe and our environment. All of this suggests our planet may be rare, if not unique, and that the Creator wanted us to be able to explore the cosmos.

“If the universe had not been made with the most exacting precision, we could never have come into existence,” said Harvard-educated astrophysicist John A. O’Keefe of NASA. “It is my view that these circumstances indicate the universe was created for man to live in.”

The Evidence of Biochemistry

Darwin said, “If it could be demonstrated that any complex organ existed which could not possibly have been formed by numerous, successive, slight modifications, my theory would absolutely break down.” Biochemist Michael Behe has demonstrated exactly that through his description of “irreducibly complex” molecular machines.

These complicated, microscopic contraptions, such as cilia and bacterial flagella, are extremely unlikely to have been built piece-by-piece through Darwinian processes, because they had to be fully present in order to function. Other examples include the incredible system of transporting proteins within cells and the intricate process of blood clotting.

More than just a devastating challenge to Darwinism, these amazing biological systems which far exceed the capacity of human technology point toward a transcendent Creator. “My conclusion,” said Behe, “can be summed up in a single word: design. I say that based on science. I believe that irreducibly complex systems are strong evidence of a purposeful, intentional design by an intelligent agent.”

The Evidence of Biological Information

The six feet of DNA coiled inside every one of our body’s one hundred trillion cells contain a four-letter chemical alphabet that spells out precise assembly instructions for all the proteins from which our bodies are made. Cambridge-educated Stephen Meyer demonstrated that no hypothesis has come close to explaining how information got into biological matter by naturalistic means.

On the contrary, he said that whenever we find a sequential arrangement that’s complex and corresponds to an independent pattern or function such as books and computer code, this kind of information is always the product of intelligence.

“Information is the hallmark of a mind,” Meyer said. “And purely from the evidence of genetics and biology, we can infer the existence of a mind that’s far greater than our own — a conscious, purposeful, rational, intelligent designer who’s amazingly creative.”

The Evidence of Consciousness

Many scientists are concluding that the laws of chemistry and physics cannot explain our experience of consciousness. Professor J.P. Moreland defined consciousness as our introspection, sensations, thoughts, emotions, desires, beliefs and free choices that make us alive and aware. The “soul” contains our consciousness and animates our body.

According to a researcher who showed that consciousness can continue after a person’s brain has stopped functioning, current scientific findings “would support the view that ‘mind,’ ‘consciousness,’ or the ‘soul’ is a separate entity from the brain.”

As Moreland said, “You can’t get something from nothing.” If the universe began with dead matter having no conscious, “how, then, do you get something totally different — consciousness, living, thinking, feeling, believing creatures — from materials that don’t have that?” But if everything started with the mind of God, he said, “we don’t have a problem with explaining the origin of our mind.”

This article can be found Here

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5 Communication Tools That Can Save Your Marriage

Wednesday, 18 January 2017 by Johnny Harwood

We were blissfully in love and thrilled to be on our honeymoon. Then came day five—we had our first argument. That put us on a slippery slope moving swiftly toward desperation. Within the first nine months of our marriage, Gina and I were both convinced that we not only married the wrong person, but also were condemned to a loveless marriage.

One very tangible side effect of our difficulties was poor communication. I would ask, “What’s for dinner?” She would hear, “I can’t believe you haven’t prepared dinner again tonight!”

She would say, “What time are you coming home?” I would hear, “You better get here and help me because you’re never here.”

We could not express anything we wanted to. We resorted to hurting each other with our words. We did not build each other up … we tore each other down and caused deep, emotional pain. Quite honestly, we had endured so much hurt that we could not see any hope for ever communicating well. Our despair was overwhelming.

In counseling we began learning about intentional communication. I remember thinking, “That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. This stuff is so simple … I can’t believe I’m paying this guy for this.”

But, once I got off of my high horse, I realized something very simple yet profound: If communication was really that simple, everyone would be doing it and all of our communication would glorify God and reflect His image (1 Peter 4:11; Ephesians 4:29). Glorifying God did not describe my communication, and it may not describe yours either. In fact, many of us struggle to communicate well even with those we love the most: our siblings, our parents, our children, our spouse.

The road I took to learn about communication was a tough one. Here are some of the tools that helped transform my marriage and change my heart.

 

  1. The Principle of First Response: The course of a conflict is not determined by the person who initiates, but by the person who responds.

You may feel it’s okay to strike at someone verbally because, “He is picking a fight with me.” You may be correct, but that person does not have the power to decide whether a fight actually occurs. That power rests with the responder. As Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

Jesus has a well-worn track record with the Principle of First Response. Recall the times that the Scribes and the Pharisees came to question Him. They were the initiators in nearly all of their communication. Their intention was to defraud Jesus and corner Him. In how many cases were they successful? None. They failed because the power to decide the direction of each conflict rested with Jesus, the responder (Luke 20:19-26).

The implications of following Jesus’ example were huge. My wife’s sin did not give me free license to sin in return. And conversely, my sin did not give Gina free license either. By following the principle of first response, we were being called to take a poorly spoken comment and redirect it.

 

  1. The Principle of Physical Touch: It is difficult to sin against someone while you are tenderly touching him or her.

A difficult time to apply this principle is after an argument has begun. However, a perfect time is when you know you are about to sit down and have a discussion about something that might lead to tension.

You know what those topics are in your marriage. Maybe it’s a conversation about a specific child. Maybe it’s your in-laws or your finances. For us, as you might imagine, it was when we sat down to talk about our communication. Those were tough conversations.

During these times, we would sit down and pray together … and touch. Usually we were at opposite ends of the couch with Gina’s legs stretched out across mine while I held them. (You may prefer holding hands or sitting close enough that you naturally touch.)

As we talked, we would inevitably notice something. When our conversation began to drift toward conflict, we stopped touching. We found what I’m certain you’ll find: It is very difficult to fight with someone you are tenderly touching. So, we had a choice at that point: to stop fighting so we could keep touching or to stop touching so we could keep fighting.

This type of tender touching has served us in two ways. First, it is a deterrent from arguing. Second, when we do drift into an argument, our physical separation is a visual and physical cue that our conversation is no longer glorifying God. We notice it, correct it, and get back on the right track.

 

  1. The Principle of Proper Timing: The success of a conversation can be maximized if the timing of the conversation is carefully chosen.

The book of Proverbs tells us, “A man finds joy in giving an apt reply—and how good is a timely word!” (15:23).

Typically, the first opportunity Gina and I have to talk about the day is at dinner. We often take time then to catch up. With four young children, our dinner table is an active and busy one. Consequently, we cannot practically have an extended and meaningful conversation.

So, if something has occurred that I must discuss with Gina, I will wait until the children are asleep. To bring it up during dinner is to invite frustration and ineffectiveness.

Let’s look at a couple of scenarios where we’re more likely to fail.

Gina is a very intentional homemaker and often has wonderful ideas on how to better serve our family. Let’s say she is contemplating a new approach to family dining. She’s been thinking through this for weeks and she’s now ready to get my input. This is a very good thing—but probably not at 1:30 on a Sunday afternoon when I’m watching a football game.

I’m also prone to fall into the poor timing trap. For example, Gina and I could be downstairs enjoying normal conversation. We head upstairs at 11:30 p.m. and Gina is ready for bed. As the lights go out, I ask, “What do you think God is doing with the children?” This is a question Gina would love for me to ask … about three hours earlier. When 11:30 comes, she’s ready for bed—not an extensive discussion.

There are times when a conversation is critical to have at that very moment. In those cases, of course, the football game goes off and we talk. Or, the lights go back on and we’re up until 2 a.m. However, those should be the exceptions rather than the rule. The majority of the time, we should be more strategic in the timing of our conversations.

Are you a “share your feelings” type of communicator or “Just the facts?” We share about this and more proven tips for communication at the Weekend To Remember getaway. Find out which one you are!

 

  1. The Principle of Mirroring: Understanding can be enhanced if we measure it often throughout a conversation.

The Scriptures inform us that, if we are to understand and become wise, we must be sure to incline our ears. Proverbs 22:17 states, “Incline your ear and hear the words of the wise, and apply your mind to my knowledge.”

Have you ever meant one thing by what you said but the person you were talking to heard something else? It can make for very frustrating communication. If you’re not sure if your spouse is getting what you’re talking about, check to see if you hear this phrase a lot: “What do you mean by that?”

Mirroring can help you test whether you are hearing your spouse properly. Once your spouse makes a point … repeat it to him or her. Say something like this: “So, what I hear you saying is …” or, “Are you saying … ?” Then, in your own words, tell your spouse what you understand to have been said. Then, the most important part of mirroring comes. You must allow your spouse to either affirm or correct what you’ve said.

As we learned this principle, I often didn’t like Gina’s negative or inaccurate summaries of my statements. So, I defended them and failed to allow her the freedom to speak honestly. In time, I learned that her summaries actually were quite accurate; my reactions were negative because I didn’t like how they exposed me.

The point of mirroring is not to be right, not to defend yourself, but to know that you are hearing accurately. If you seek to understand rather than to make yourself understood, then you are primed for success with the principle of mirroring.

 

  1. The Principle of Prayer: Success in communication is more likely when we invite God to be an active participant and guide.

This principle is not complicated, but it requires our close attention. We’ve become so accustomed to hearing about prayer that its importance often passes us by.

No matter what principle you might be using at the time or what subject you might be talking about, no scenario is beyond prayer. I have tended to overestimate my own ability to communicate well and righteously. That was evidenced in our first year of marriage.

We will eventually and inevitably sin in our communication with each other. When it begins to drift away from God’s intended purpose for it, we have a choice: Will we be puffed up with pride or will we have the humility to stop right where we are and ask God to help redeem our conversation?

I wish someone would have shared with me what late 19th and early 20th century evangelist R.A. Torrey said on prayer:

The reason why many fail in battle is because they wait until the hour of battle. The reason why others succeed is because they have gained their victory on their knees long before the battle came … Anticipate your battles; fight them on your knees before temptation comes, and you will always have victory.

One of the greatest difficulties that couples face with this principle is awkwardness. They are not used to praying together. So, as they begin to like each other less in the midst of unconstructive communication, the thought of praying together is not very appealing.

We learned an easy fix to this … start praying together. Begin with 30 seconds of prayer as you go to bed each night. Pray regularly as a family prior to eating. Pick one night a week to pray for your children, your pastor, and your marriage. Among the enormous benefits that you’ll see in your family, the regularity of prayer will make praying in the midst of communication breakdown more probable.

 

The transformation never ends

As a result of God’s grace intersecting with these principles, communication is now among the greatest strengths of our marriage. It’s not that we don’t still mess up—we do. Thankfully, God continues to work on me. He’ll continue to work on you, too.

At one time, I was convinced that I married the wrong woman. She was convinced she married the wrong man. Now, we cannot imagine knowing, loving, or enjoying anyone more than we do each other.

Your relationship with your spouse may differ from ours, but this much is true: Your spouse should be the single most important person you have in your life. Like it or not, communication is the tool that God has given us to knit our hearts and our minds together. Success is possible if we’re willing to apply some intentional principles. We’ve all been called to God-honoring communication. Step forward in humility and faith and watch Him transform you.

Original article can be found here

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25 Maximums to Help You Plan

Monday, 09 January 2017 by ccfadmin

If you review these maximums consistently, I’m sure you will live a life that matters.

I suggest that you use these maximums as your personal checklist. Check them periodically to see the items you need to improve, and make a personal commitment to apply them. Over time, you can measure your progress in applying these. If they are consequently applied it will result in a life that matters.

So here are the 25 maximums to help you live a life that matters:

1.    Discover what matters to you – Plan it
Success overall has less to do with finding the best idea, organizational structure, or life model, than with discovering what matters to you. A Christ centered life is the best place to start.

2.    Have the courage to do what matters – Make changes
You create enduring success not because you are perfect or lucky but because you have the courage to do what matters to you.

3.    Don’t strictly rely on others’ approval – Please the Lord first
Successful people don’t rely on the approval of everyone to pursue their cause or calling. They are more emotionally committed to doing what they love than being loved by others. We do need godly counselors but not the opinion of people who have little wisdom or care for us.

4.    Redefine success – A godly life that makes an impact
The real definition of success is a life and work that bring personal fulfillment and lasting relationships and makes a difference in the world in which they live.

5.    Don’t chase money and recognition – Seek the Kingdom of God
Money and recognition are just outcomes of passionately working often on an entirely different objective that is often a personal cause or calling.

6.    Recognize signs of passion – Use your passion to bless others
Achievers become lovers of an idea they are passionate about for years and years. They lose track of the passage of time while doing it. In a real sense, it’s something that they’d be willing to do for free, for its own sake. This may be something you will regret if you don’t pursue it at least a little bit.

7.    Worry more about being what you love – Fear God more than man
Most of us worry more about being loved than being what we love. Being a people pleaser causes drift.

8.    Check regularly whether you’re on the right track – Search me Oh God.
Planning always takes periodic adjustments to get you where you want to be.  Don’t be afraid to tweak your plan from time to time.

9.    Find your mission in life – What is your part in His plan?
To find your mission in life is to discover the intersection between your heart’s deep gladness and the Lord’s perfect plan.

10.    Find place for your multiple passions – Plug into church and society
You do need to find a place for everything that is meaningful to you. When you exclude all other things except a single focus for your life, there is a danger that you might find it impossible to locate the real treasure.

11.    Experiment with your other passions – Seek, ask and knock
Carve out a little time each week to experiment in some way with one of your other passions.

12.    Never retire from what you love – You are always valuable unless you quit
Godly passions create meaning in our lives. It usually builds a legacy and memories.

13.    Be yourself – Live your unique God plan
You shouldn’t hijack someone else’s life plan system. Seek your plan by prayer.

14.    Do what matters despite popularity or political correctness – Go what is right before God
Doing things despite the political correctness of the path is the price of admission to almost every enduring life of lasting impact. Do what is right not what is popular or politically correct.

15.    Have passion, determination, and skill – Be diligent
Life takes passion, determination, and skill. You can’t skip any of those three and expect to enjoy success that lasts.

16.    Be greedy to acquire knowledge for your dream – Seek wisdom
If you should be greedy about anything, it should be about acquiring “intellectual capital” for your dream. Get wisdom and knowledge.

17.    Recognize when to move – Seek the Spirit’s guidance
When you find that striving for excellence is unreachable or joyless, you may need to move onto something else.  Fundamental things like marriage we should fight for but insignificant things can be left behind.

18.    Have the right attitude toward difficulties – Rely on the Lord
Having many difficulties perfects the person; having no difficulties ruins the person. Embrace difficulties with a plan and a passion to change one’s self.

19.    Make failure your friend – Learn in humility
Many highly accomplished people described themselves as so proficient at making mistakes that, if you didn’t know better, you might think they were losers. Enduringly successful people harvest failure. They become more resolute after losing a battle they believe in because they learn from the loss. Losers call it failure; winners call it learning.

20.    Always make new mistakes – Don’t be hearers only but doers
When you make mistakes, just be sure to make new ones. A plan helps avoid old mistakes.

21.    Have a prepared mind – Gentile as doves but shrewd as serpents
Only a prepared mind and open heart prevails. Being prepared give you a high degree of success.

22.    Have clear goals – Consider the ants
The godly use planning and goals – often big goals – to put themselves into a opportune position.

23.    Have explorer mentality – Don’t be an old wine skin
Be adventurous without ignoring the roadmap. Allow a little sightseeing on the way.

24.    Surround yourself with “godly producers” – Seek Godly counselors
Successful people spent the largest percentage of their time tracking down, surrounding themselves with, and developing the people who are “godly producers”.

25.    Get the inconsistent stuff out – Lose the meaningless
Alignment requires that you get out of your life all the stuff that is inconsistent with your passions and goal. That includes people, places, activities, and things. Choose wisely.

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5 Steps to Resist Temptation

Monday, 02 January 2017 by Johnny Harwood

5 Practices to Resist Temptation and Grow Stronger

  1. Recognize Your Tendency to Sin

James 1:14 explains that we are tempted when we become enticed by our own natural desires. The first step toward overcoming temptation is to recognize the human tendency to be seduced by our own fleshly desires.

Temptation to sin is a given, so don’t be surprised by it. Expect to be tempted daily, and be prepared for it.

  1. Flee From Temptation

The New Living Translation of 1 Corinthians 10:13 is easy to understand and apply:

But remember that the temptations that come into your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can’t stand up against it. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you will not give in to it.

When you come face to face with temptation, look for the way out—the way of escape—that God has promised. Then skedaddle. Flee. Run as fast as you can.

3. Resist Temptation With the Word of Truth

Hebrews 4:12 says that God’s Word is living and active. Did you know you can carry a weapon that will make your thoughts obey Jesus Christ? If you don’t believe me, read 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 One of these weapons is the Word of God.

Jesus overcame the devil’s temptations in the wilderness with the Word of God. If it worked for him, it will work for us. And because Jesus was fully human, he is able to identify with our struggles and give us the exact help we need to resist temptation.

While it can be helpful to read God’s Word when you’re being tempted, sometimes that’s not practical. Even better is to practice reading the Bible daily so that eventually you have so much of it on the inside, you are ready whenever temptation comes.

4. Refocus Your Mind and Heart With Praise

How often have you been tempted to sin when your heart and mind were fully concentrated on worshiping the Lord? I’m guessing your answer is never.

Praising God takes our focus off of self and puts it on God. You may not be strong enough to resist temptation on your own, but as you focus on God, he will inhabit your praises. He will give you the strength to resist and walk away from the temptation.

May I suggest Psalm 147 as a good place to start?

5. Repent Quickly When You Fail

In several places, the Bible tells us the best way to resist temptation is to flee from it (1 Corinthians 6:18; 1 Corinthians 10:14; 1 Timothy 6:11; 2 Timothy 2:22). Yet still we fall from time to time. When we fail to flee from temptation, inevitably we fall.

This article can be found in its entirety at here

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Being A Light At Work

Tuesday, 20 December 2016 by Johnny Harwood

Let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

MATTHEW 5:16 (NIV)

Working in a place where Christians are the minority can often be challenging. You might be tempted to hunker down, do your work and then rush home each day. But instead of quietly surviving, God has called us to be a light in the darkness. That means we are to shine brightly and not cower in our cubicle. To speak truth in love, not simply acquiesce to the attitudes and beliefs of our co-workers so as not to make waves. We are to be the bright spot in a dark world, proclaiming the love and salvation our Savior has to offer.

Easier said than done, right? Well, here are some practical ways you can be a light at your job:

1. Words Matter

It’s easy to fall into the speech habits of those around you. It may be tempting to curse that client who is making your life hard, join in a gossip session or bad-mouth a bad boss. But remember, your co-workers are listening. Ephesians 4:29 tells us to speak only words that will be uplifting to others. Hang a decoration with encouraging words near your desk to remind yourself to trust God in all circumstances. Having His truth as a constant reminder can help you think before you speak.

2. Attitude Adjustment

Stress, dreaded tasks, uncooperative co-workers, lack of recognition…there are numerous things in your workplace that can bring you down. But, how do you react? Do you grumble and complain or do you choose to trust God and be positive? Remember that you can do all things through Christ who gives you strength (Philippians 4:13). Rest in the assurance that God will get you through every situation, and show others what it means to have the joy of the Lord, no matter the circumstances. Place a reminder at your desk to praise God and focus on His goodness. Believe me, people will notice.

3. Showcase the Truth

Another way to witness is to simply let God’s Word speak for itself. Drink your morning coffee in this “Pursue Truth” mug and take it with you to your team meetings. You can also place Scripture sharables prominently on your desk. These are non-confrontational ways to present the Word to your co-workers and plant a seed in their hearts. After all, you never know how it will touch or convict them.

4. Go One-on-One

It’s hard to find obvious opportunities to talk about your relationship with Jesus when you’re on the clock. An easy way to get some one-on-one time, however, is to invite a co-worker to lunch. Genuinely get to know them as you talk about more casual things like kids, hobbies and activities. Eventually, the Holy Spirit may open a door for you to speak about your relationship with a loving God. Pray Ephesians 6:19-20 before you go and ask the Lord to open doors for His Kingdom to be released in your interaction.

5. Show a Servant’s Heart

You’ve heard the saying “actions speak louder than words.” Often what we do can be an even louder witness than what we say. Look for opportunities to serve your fellow co-workers. Give a sweet baby gift to someone out on maternity leave or send a sincere sympathy card to a co-worker who recently lost a loved one. Other ways to serve might include offering a ride to someone whose car is in the shop. If you have Christian music playing in your car, the lyrics of a song might minister to them. Through you, these small actions can speak volumes about God’s immeasurable love for your co-workers.

 

This Article can be found at: https://www.dayspring.com/articles/5-ways-to-shine-your-light-in-the-workplace#

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